EFT For The Reluctant Housewife

As I mentioned previously, I recently had to give up my oldest baby – my business. In order to do the best work I can in my kind of business you need to be able to have quiet time to focus and concentrate for several hours during the work day. With 2 children under the age of 5 quiet time is nearly non-existent around here.

Before we moved to Canada, I had found the holy grail. A home daycare that was not only wonderful and safe but also inexpensive. With the eldest kid being kept happily busy for several hours a day and the youngest one being too little to require much attention my business thrived.

Then came my husband’s layoff and our move to Canada where a quality daycare (at least in my area) is incredibly expensive. Also, my youngest was now starting to walk and needing very close supervision. I concluded that whatever I earned from my business would be spent in it’s majority in daycare costs. For this reason I decided to close down my virtual business’ doors for the time being.

I knew rationally it was the right thing to do. I can focus on raising my children and keeping the house and I wouldn’t have to worry about missing deadlines or stressing out over not being able to make phone calls because my eldest is having a tantrum. Seems ideal… in theory.

Unfortunately, I have discovered that I am missing the Domestic Goddess gene. After 35 years of being a single, career minded woman finding myself a housewife now has been a very difficult transition.

Oh.. why do I hate being a SAHM (Stay at Home Mom)? Let me count the ways:

• I hate housework (see my previous post: Tapping on Housework)
• I am an unimaginative (ok.. maybe just lazy) Mom. I can never figure what to do with my children. They mainly roam the house playing with their toys.
• I miss the mental stimulation of having a business. Taking care of young children is about as monotonous as it gets.
• I am not a very skillful cook. In my previous life I ate out a lot.
• I resent my husband for going out in the world of adults while I feel stuck in the prison of my home. I could take the children out but its always a major ordeal. (Did I mention I was lazy.. maybe just depressed)

All of the above fills me with guilt and shame and I haven’t found a script that targets these issues specifically in on all my web searching. So I just made up my own:

Karate Chop: Eventhough I am an awful mother and I should be filling my children’s days with stimulating activities, I deeply and completely love and accept myself.

Eventhough I suck at keeping house and I resent having to do it all myself, I choose to find ways to make housework fun.

Eventhough I am bored out of my mind and I should be enjoying every second with my children but I am not and that makes me feel guilty, I deeply and completely honor and accept all of my feelings anyway.

Eyebrow – I am an awful mother

Side of Eye – I am an awful housewife

Under Eye – I am an awful wife

Under Nose –  I feel like my brain is shrinking

Under lip – I am so bored. I can’t stand the monotony. Everyday is the same thing over and over.

Collarbone – I should be better at this. Why can’t I enjoy this.

Under arm – Many women would kill to be able to stay home with their children

Top of head – I’m ungrateful and just a bad, bad person.

Wow! There is a LOT of emotion tied up in this conflict. I think I need to do a few more rounds.

I suspect that resolving this internal battle and releasing all the shame and guilt it brings would open me up to attract all the abundance I deserve. And since I eat when I’m stressed and depressed, resolving this issue would also help me lose weight.